As time goes by

My grandma's 90th birthday is on Sunday. My grandma is amazing. I remember her making clothes for my dolls when I was very young. She crocheted baby blankets, afghans, and clothes, and made intricately beaded jewelery. She can no longer do most of these things. Between her failing eyesight and carpal tunnel syndrome, things just don't come together like they once did. My grandmother is still an amazing woman-she serves in her church callings with dedication, and loves my family. I am grateful for her example and lessons.

All of this has me thinking about my genes. I have long life genes from both sides-my dad's mom is not far behind mom's mom, and his aunt lived to over 100, as did my mom's great aunt. I am...over 21. I have started to realize that I can't do things I used to be able to do, or that they aren't as easy as they used to be. I remember soccer in high school, and when I play now I just can't do some things I used to do...easily. I imagine this problem worsens with age. I can still see relatively well (as long as I'm wearing my contacts), I can crochet, knit and sew without trouble. I can French braid my own hair, which is neither grey nor falling out. Running is only sometimes painful (outside of the normal soreness because I don't do it regularly enough), and yoga keeps me pretty flexible. There will be a time, I'm afraid, that these things are no longer true. At this point, I hope to have figured out what it means to grow old with grace.

Meanwhile, my goal is to live a life that I will be content to look back on. I do not want to regret my actions, nor do I wish to mourn things I should have and could have done, but didn't for whatever reason. This means I have to know myself well enough to confidently decide when to take action and when to hold back. I think I'm well on my way-I have lived an amazing life up to now. I am grateful for the blessings that have made this possible. I look forward to whatever my future holds, because I know there are things waiting that I can't even imagine right now.